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Are you making life more difficult than it has to be?

4/28/2015

Do you ever wonder if the things you've always believed are actually true? Here are some examples of beliefs you might want to question...

"If I make THAT mistake, I'm unforgivable."
"I can get things done, but I'll never be one of the greats."
"I just don't have the right look."
"If I don't do it, it won't get done."
"You can't teach an old dog new tricks."
"My sister was the smart one. I just don't have that gift."
"I'll never be organized."

We absorb beliefs such as these early in life. They may even work well for us during childhood, but they are holding us back as adults. In coaching, we call them gremlins... the little voices that were given to us. They don't belong to us. There's a deeper voice within calling you to rise above these limiting beliefs and become the person you were born to be. Let's talk about how to silence the gremlins so that you can listen to and be guided by your true self.

Yes! You are Needy.

4/21/2015

Okay, so the title is a bit misleading, but now that I have your attention... it's true... you have needs! If anyone ever tells you that she doesn't need anything, ask her to hold her breath for ten minutes. The need for air will soon become her highest concern and will drive every aspect of her thinking and behavior.

That's what needs do. They drive us. Our need for food drives us to eat. Our need for companionship drives us to join and meet. Our need for love drives us to risk and become vulnerable.

What happens when we don't admit our needs or are unaware of them? They don't go away. They can't go away... they are needs, not just wants, after all! When we don't acknowledge our needs, they continue to drive us, but they drive us in unattractive ways. For example, if I'm not aware of my need for admiration, that need will drive me to get admiration in just about any way I can. I'll become the guy who annoyingly boasts of my accomplishments as I fish for compliments the size of whales. But, if I am aware of my need for admiration, I can develop healthy strategies to fulfill the need in appropriate ways such as excelling at something and enjoying the unsolicited comments of those who notice. I can tame the need as I get back into the driver's seat of my life.

Coaching can clarify your needs and give you methods for getting them met in attractive and deeply satisfying ways. And when your needs are met, life can blossom in unexpected ways! Let's talk.

Author:
Jim Merhaut, M.S.Ed., P.C.C.

Jim is the founder and director of Coaching to Connect. He has three decades of experience in organizational and relationship work including coaching, consulting, non-profit CEO, program director, project manager, teacher, author and more. Jim holds a Master of Science degree in Education from Duquesne University with an emphasis in Adult Spiritual Formation.

Are you making life more difficult than it has to be?

Yes! You are Needy.

Author:Jim Merhaut, M.S.Ed., P.C.C.

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Author:
Jim Merhaut, M.S.Ed., P.C.C.